Mommas, SOCIETY isn’t making you tired, stressed, and exhausted – this is
Ok, OOOOOKKKK, I have to address this.
This week, I saw an insane amount of my Facebook friends sharing this article from Motherly. They were sharing it and saying things like, “Uggg, this is so me” or “I'm so tired all the time, this is why!” and I immediately had a knee-jerk reaction to it because, as someone with two kids, who travels out-of-state 2-3 times/quarter (and drives THREE HOURS to an airport), runs a six-figure business and works A LOT, has a husband who wears A LOT of hats (preacher, farmer, day job with on-call weekends/nights), balances kids sports and activities and homework, creates 8-10 new pieces of content each week on the Internet and works out 5-6 days/week, I'm not stressed or exhausted and I don't like when articles equip women with excuses to play victim.
See, I'm NOT stressed or exhausted or whatever else you could describe modern Moms as because of one simple thing. One thing that will CHANGE the way you show up as a Momma, the way you show up as a wife and a woman, the way you see yourself, the way your kids see you, etc.
I say, “NO”, A LOT.
Actually, I say “no” quicker than I say “yes” to things. One of my husband's pet peeves is that, basically since the beginning of our relationship (in High School), if he says, “Hey, will you do me a favor?”, I will immediately shoot back a, “I dunno, what is it?” in response. Not a “sure” or a “yeah, what”, because I wanna know what I'm committing to before I commit. I mean, sure, I do NORMALLY do whatever he's needing because it's things like grabbing his glasses for him while I'm already up or getting him a drink when I'm in the kitchen, but yo' girl, is REAL GOOD at saying “no” and it saves SO MUCH stress.
“Moms are burnt out, and our society needs to start caring.” Motherly
Guess what, if you're burnt out, society doesn't give a crap, you're in the only one who can change it.
HEAR ME MOMMA…if you feel like this article mentions – stressed, tired, maxed-out, we need to fix it. And, while the end of the article hits on the solution, I wanted to expound on it —->
You feel this stressed, this exhausted, this maxed out BECAUSE you are not saying “no” enough.
Your children will still love you if they don't play EVERY sport this season.
You're still a good Mom if you don't take your kids to 4 back-to-back birthday parties this weekend.
You do not have to volunteer at the school or coach 3-year-old soccer to be a “good Mom” (gasp, I know).
You don't have to talk to people who make you feel more stressed, even if they're family.
You do NOT have to listen to unsolicited advice or give a flying fart what anybody thinks about your parenting decisions.
You CAN say “no” to that crappy job you're working (yes you can, it may mean people will think you're crazy, that you need to switch jobs, that you need to start a business, etc, but you can) so you're not so stressed at home.
You can say “no” to being the only person in charge of keeping the house clean, grocery shopping, running the children everywhere (housecleaners, babysitters and…y'all, HUSBANDS/partners can and should help).
You can say “no” to baking 14 cakes for the Church bake sale or teaching Sunday School and still be a good Christian Mom.
You can say “no” to Netflix, Facebook and Instagram at night so you can get in bed earlier. Hell, you can say “NO” to those things all together, not just at night.
You can say “no” to going to lunch with your co-workers so you can go to the gym.
You can protect your time by not answering texts until you have time or sending calls to voicemail until YOU are ready to chat.
You do not have to make Pinterest-worthy cupcakes for your child to feel loved.
You don't have to make 4 different meals.
You don't have to have the latest iPhone to keep up with the Joneses and you can definitely say, “No” when your kids ask for one – especially if it will financially strap you and your family.
YOU 👏🏻 CAN 👏🏻 AND 👏🏻 SHOULD 👏🏻 BE 👏🏻 SAYING 👏🏻 NO 👏🏻 WAY 👏🏻 MORE.
You've got this Momma, you're doing great and 2020 is going to be a better year for you!
If you're ready, if THIS IS THE YEAR you start saying “no” and stop being the over-stressed Momma, download this FREE phone wallpaper to remind you er'single day that you need to say NO more.